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My story of how I overcame the fear - hope it helps!

I thought I would share my story of how I overcame my fear of driving..

Firstly,
I knew my fear was psychological. I have never struggled with anything -
I have generally been an over achiever in all spheres of my life.
However, at the age of 18 my father was teaching me to drive and just
before I went for my test, he died of cancer. On his deathbed I promised
him that I would get my license. My family and the nurses asked me to
promise him that I would get my license without him, because they said
he needed to let go. Very dramatic, very sad, and it screwed my head up
when it came to getting behind the wheel. I couldn’t do the test.

We all have our reasons, some we understand, some are unfathomable,
but regardless, the fear is real, the heart palpitations, the sweaty
hands, the inability to think clearly, the panic - are all very real
symptoms that can make driving unmanageable once the phobia has taken
hold.

It took EIGHT years, about 100 professional driving lessons and
three unsuccessful driving tests for me to get
me my license and another year and a half of driving 5 days a week
before the fear finally left me. That’s a really long time, but I did
conquer
my fear. Here is what I did:

After eight years and even though I had finally (undeservedly)
earned my license thanks to a sympathetic traffic officer who I’m sure
felt sorry for the nervous wreck that was me, I had resigned myself to
the fact that I wasn’t meant
to drive. However, while studying for a psychology exam, I learnt how
the mind and body work physiologically and psychologically. An actual
example in my text described how most people are nervous when they first
start driving as the experience is new and there is so much to think
about. However, with enough exposure to the act of driving, they
eventually drive automatically without even thinking about it. This text
made me decide to embark upon the challenge: Learn to drive
independently by repeated exposure to the act of driving.

I started by driving the fifteen minute route to my work with my
husband in the seat next to me. At work, we would swop seats and he
would drive home and fetch me again later. At first, I used every excuse
in the book not to drive back home, and I usually got out of it. I’d
also often make excuses to not drive to work. My boyfriend patiently put
up with me and three months later I was in a "comfort zone" as long as
my husband was next to me. He went away for three weeks in the middle of
winter, and he thought I should drive alone during this time. He made
me drive around the block alone - a total of four quiet suburban streets
the day before he left. I panicked - I stalled the car at every turn
and I arrived back outside our house a quivering mess and in tears. I
couldn’t do it! For three weeks I walked in the pouring rain in the dark
to the bus stop, and took the bus. I couldn’t even bring myself to back
the car out of the garage. I was too afraid.

Eventually, after six months driving to work with my husband by my side,
he was sick one day and it was too late to take the bus - I was forced
to drive myself to work ALONE!

It was a triumphant day when I got to work in one piece, but at about
3pm I started feeling sick to my stomach at the thought of driving home
again. I asked a colleague to tail me, and talking to myself the whole
way I managed to drive home. I felt great, but my legs were like jelly
when I got home.

I then started driving to work and back alone. After a month of this, I
ventured out of my comfort zone, to a parking lot about 6 blocks from my
house. I was a nervous wreck, but I did it! I felt so proud and elated!
I had to meet my brother, and parked about a ten minute walk away from
where we were meant to meet because I was too scared to try park any
closer - I had mapped the route to the parking lot in my head and felt
"safe" aiming for that milestone.

I then made little "milestones" - a coffee shop just down the street, or
driving down a new street on my way home. One day I aimed for the local
grocery store, just down the road. I was too afraid to venture into the
parking area, so parked in an "easy" spot across the road from the
centre.

I eventually made it onto the highway - with my husband next to me. I
was petrified.

About 6 months after driving alone for the first time, I drove alone, on
the highway, to the busy city centre about twenty minutes from my house
with a granny and two kids in the car, while trying to hide the fact
that I was petrified - I "bluffed" my way through the drive, after a
sleepless weekend panicking about it. I made it, and Granny thanked me
for driving "so well" (She thought I was driving at 30 km per hour for
her sake!!)

That was a triumphant day.

1. That was the turning point, and it was about 6 months ago. The trick was
   to get used to the act of driving, to feel as though you control the
   car, and not that the car controls you, and to get familiar with the
   rules of the road and the street signs. It was a long, slow journey to
   get to this place, where I can drive with confidence. I think my journey
   was extreme, but I’m glad I never gave up. Just tackle your fear in
   baby steps and one day you WILL be driving. It feels great!!